HNT: My Favourite Things

This picture contains a few of my favourite things - cuffs, rope, and my mink blanket. Does it contain some of your favourite things too?

This HNT (way off theme as it is) is lucky number 13. HHNT people.

I have a New Master

I had lunch with the Gorean Master from the party last week on saturday, to sort out my own head and talk with him. Lunch went on for a while, and afterwards neither of us seemed particularly keen to go anywhere so we wandered around downtown for a bit. In fact, neither of us really wanted to leave each other's company, so, we didn't.

He drove me home - with my hands cuffed behind me - and I went to fetch what I needed for the rest of the day. Shortly after heading out he pulled over and had me lie down on the back seat, where he cuffed me again, blindfolded me and bound my ankles. I'd just been 'abducted'.

It was a long drive back to his place. I didn't even know where the heck we were going, though I could tell when we got on the motorway. It was a very sublime experience, lying tied in the backseat with no visual reference, with him murmuring things to me to keep me in the headspace (like I wasn't there already) and occasionally reaching back to fondle me. Most definitely thrilling.

Once at his place he unbound my ankles but left me blindfolded and handcuffed as he lead me inside and up to the living room, where I knelt on the rug while he straightened things up and got changed. It was certainly something to have him take off the blindfold and be confronted with him decked out all in viking gear, complete with drinking horn (a Torvaldslander, perhaps?) and also didn't give me much time to process the rest of the room before he drew the blade at his hip, pressed it to my throat and gave me the traditional Gorean option of servitude or death. I could tell the knife was blunt but damn what a head rush. You know which one I picked, and I drank from his horn.

He stood me up and switched my cuffs for a sirik. I still hadn't had time to even process the room we were in, the world might as well have been just us. Interesting mind trick. He stood me on his shield and sliced my clothes off me (prearranged, so at least I wasn't losing anything I didn't know would be lost!) and had himself a little 'auction' to ritualistically buy me. Gor is full of rituals, but this was the first time I'd ever really experienced any of them. All Gorean slaves are sold naked. I was frightened, my tension showed it, and it wasn't lost on him. We might have played before and I trusted him, but I still had no real idea what he wanted of me (as a matter of fact, I still don't).

I couldn't exactly say the rest of the day was 'languid', but it wasn't as fast-paced as a BDSM scene. Unfortunately I tend to remember the bad bits more clearly than the good bits. I spent a time in the kitchen doing his dishes, and he spanked me with the wooden spoon I had neglected, which left me blubbering like a baby for a good while. My ass was still tingling from it when I woke up the next day, and it actually left faint bruises. He tested out several of his floggers on me through the day, pushing past my pain threshold with each but thankfully not far, and he also got out a hitachi vibrator twice and left me a puddle of orgasmic mush. The second time was with some painfully tight nipple clamps in place, and he took them off with vibrator in place. The pain was enough that it actually denied me orgasm despite being on the brink.

One ritual that I had been hoping would be neglected was the initiatory whipping. Well, it wasn't neglected, not in the slightest. He took me down to his dungeon and had me straddle a horizontal, padded pole, chaining my wrists and fitting a spreader bar. He had quite an impressive array to use on me, but the first he brought out was my tiny little red suede flogger. I will never, ever underestimate that little thing ever again because he made it bloody HURT! They all bloody hurt, I was crying through most of it, though he gave me time to recover and he told me later that he was only using a fraction of his full strength. He spent a fair bit of time comforting me, and then took me home. It had gone past ten and we hadn't even stopped for dinner.

The first day for a slave is hardly typical. I don't think I could stay with him if he pushed me as hard as he did that day on a regular basis. I guess I won't really find out until our next day together.

He's picked out a slave name for me, but I don't get to hear it until the next time we're together. He's also sending me some fabric to make up some slave garments with. I probably haven't represented events completely clearly here, like I said I frequently remember the bad clearer than the good, but I do remember that it felt right, and I can't wait to see where it goes. For the first time in months I feel truly sexual and sensual again, the barriers are dropping, and I am finally free again to grow.

Gorean-space

Out of the blue on saturday I got an invite for a play party that night. I wasn't even sure if I was going to go, it was already getting late by the time I saw the email. I did though, and I'm glad I did. The guy who invited me gave me a lift, and on the way there I found out he is in fact a Gorean Master.

Shock, wonder. A Gorean Master, a single Gorean Master, a local single Gorean Master. Maybe there's still hope for me here after all. If it weren't for his age I would definitely try things with him, but he must be at least twice my age, so I don't know ...

The party itself was well underway by the time we arrived. There were the remains of a barbeque, and a huge chocolate cake for later (as it was the host's birthday party). There were several rooms set up for play, with signs everywhere that this was a very kinky household. I'm going to have to get tips when I'm creating my own hardware.

I didn't really have any intention of playing, just to go with the flow. I'd been missing my rope though, so during dessert I changed into my tight, short (very short) black dress and pulled out the rope with the idea to challenge the doms present to tie me so I couldn't wiggle free.

I didn't get very far with that plan though. The Gorean wound the rope about my waist and led me to one of the play rooms. He took me by the hair, set me on my knees and cuffed my hands behind me. Instant subspace. To an observer it probably wouldn't have looked like he was doing much as he continued, but he manipulated me so well. I was trembling almost the entire time.

He had this neat device, a serving tray that could be strapped on so it could be carried with my hands still cuffed behind me. It was almost too big to be secured about my waist, but he put it on over the ropework, and took me out to the living room where most of the guests were. I am glad for the mirror that was on the wall so I could see him through most of the room as he added first his drink, then mine to the tray. If I hadn't been so spaced I think I would have felt rather foolish, it wasn't exactly an elegant piece of equipment ... I feel rather foolish remembering now.


He took me back to the play room, took off the tray and undid the ropework. Then he had me kiss his boots. It's not something I have done before, nor something I had even thought of as appealing, but hey, he had nice clean boots, and I didn't hesitate. The smell of the leather, kneeling small at his feet, it is as intoxicating as I had imagined. I ended up stopping the kissing fairly quickly and just lay there, breathing the scent of the leather and basking. He unhooked the cuffs and brought my wrists up to cross before me, my head lifting but still bowed, kneeling with my thighs spread. He asked if I knew this position.

Oh like anyone even vaguely familiar with Gor could not know it. He put me in the position of submission. Did this mean he really wanted me for his own? Could I live up to his expectations? Did I want to? It was too much for me, and sent me into subdrop.

I'd avoided doing any serious play for this reason, because I knew it would end in a crash. I've been aching for it for so long, but I'm still scared. Scared of being hurt again, of failing, of falling in love when it could never be permanent. I want my next relationship to be one that can last, but am I just setting myself up to be lonely for a very, very long time?


I am still thinking things over and don't really know what I am going to do, but despite the fact that the little period of submission had been a complete surprise and not negotiated in the slightest, I don't regret it. He stayed with me through the drop and made sure I was okay, the scene reminded me just how wonderful Gor and submission could be, and it's brought my sex drive back to life. Oh has it ever, I've been daydreaming ever since.

HNT: Sleeeeepy

I've been unusually tired lately, so I've been doing a lot of what I'm doing below. Just snoozing. Maybe I'm not eating enough red meat, or it's just a lack of urgency that has come with the holiday season. Oh well, I'm getting my rest.

Enjoy everyone.

Just the Little Pleasures

Last night I went to a local play party that consisted of more than six people for the first time in ... at least a year and a half, more like two. Getting an invite was a bit of a fluke, I met one of the attendees at SE and he insisted on tying me up.

It was a good party. Not the crowd I normally hang out with but I knew about a third of the people there. There was a barbeque and a kinky secret santa, then the play started.

I expected, after my inviter's excessive bragging and numerous and vehement assertions that his interest was just in the rope and trying me up, that he would actually be good and not sexually focused. He got quite possessive and subtly shooed off the three other people I had been talking/flirting with who were watching and kept sneaking strokes even though I was still fully dressed, and my hands went numb before he even finished the chest harness. It was meant to be my first suspension, but after standing there for thirty, maybe forty minutes and having him chase away the people I was actually having fun with I was rather glad of the excuse to be let free.

I spent a lot of time getting cuddly with the young and cute russian, a specialist flogger who is going home in a day or two. Oh he was very, very cute, smelled good too. Once the table had been cleared I got stripped down to my knickers and tied bent over it and he got to practice some extra gentle technique. First time with a single tail whip, and it stung like hell, even if he was going as softly as he could. I could hear (vaguely) the others who were watching laughing and commenting on my cute little squeals, and him assuring them he was going as gently as possible despite my frequent safewording! I was sitting sideways for a while afterwards.

A Mistress took a flogger to me later on, considerably more gently and teasing. I came very close to climaxing right on the table. She has been informed that she now owes me an orgasm, damnit! Her timing was impeccable.

The russian actually asked me to come back to his place afterwards. I can't even remember anyone asking me that before that I wasn't dating, but despite how flattering it was it really stirred me up in a bad way. I didn't really know what he might be expecting, how I might react to the situation, if I might end up regretting it later. I turned him down. Even though I know I'm going to be wondering what I missed out on for ages, at this point I'd rather do that than regret doing it. I'm really still an emotional ticking time bomb, and I don't even know how big the charge is. Of course after I said I wasn't going home with him he went to chase the tail of a Mistress. Rejected.

Gee, for a sex blog, I don't write much about sex, do I?